PRANA

you just don't know it. do you? ugh. when feelings collide, you are not sure of what to label it. I am talking about crushes, infatuations and more dangerously, love. I mean, I do not necessarily give a fuck about love in reality. All hugots I have came from the movies and how far fetch it is from reality thus everything that seems ideal is only ideal because it is in the movies. nothing more, nothing less. But fuck this dude. I don't get it and I don't get myself. Here I am again with these long term stupid aspirations. fuck fuck fuck. so i decided to unfollow. It has been two years since I decided to fix myself but fixing oneself is never fun, thought some parts are. I mean, in the process , you ask yourself why you want to fix yourself then it traces back to he main reason then reminds you why you initially sucked. When you finally think you are a better person, you remember again and try to make a comparison. Thus going back to the fool who just gave up on you e

I often ask myself, do I need someone to talk to or do I just need to write or do I just need an adventure. See, answers (inspirations) come in different forms. Consider your country as an inspiration.  THIS COUTNRY IS BEYOND BLESSED! Things this country can offer (somehow, a checklist for me and I will try to use this lifetime though I doubt so): 1.        Pagsanjan Water falls and its water rapids! URGH! BEYOND BEAUTIFUL 2.        CDO white water rafting 3.        Danao the Plunge 4.        Davao ultralight 5.        Surfing in Mati Davao, Siargao and La Union 6.        Zipline across the West Philippines Sea in Ilocos 7.        Canyonering in Cebu 8.        Sagada adventure 9.        Batanes 10.    Zambales star gazing 11.    Bucari hiking and waterfalls 12.    Palawan adventure (underground river, crocodile farm, El Nido, Baker’s Hill) 13.    Skycycle,hamster wheel, zipline, in inland resorts (Campuestuhan Bacolod, Eden Davao, etc.) 14.    Banan

I always feel excited when I have something to write. #lilanxuan So I finally updated my other post regarding to my last escapade. I am still beyond blessed. I know I was quite selfish in NOT INVITING other for the escapade but I thought it was for the best. I don’t mean to hurt anybody’s feelings and if I did, I am sorry but other than that, THANK YOU. THANK YOU, because someday we’ll figure out why. Moving on, KASI DAPAT KO NA TALAGA MAG MOVE FROM MY HIGH SCHOOL ISSUES, I still have ISSUE. I AM FACKIN SAD. SORRY SELF! NO! MORE LIKE TROUBLED! See, I am hoping to GRADUATE ON TIME AS BS CHEMICAL ENGINEERING THIS SEMESTER FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF THE PHILIPPINES VISAYAS but I have to OVERLOAD for my failed strength of materials subject. I thought I will study for the break but a part of me says that “DUDE IT’S BREAK! It will be the last break before employment!” It’s not that I doubt myself if I can pass ES 13 but it’s am I really ready for the real word? I know I will never

Expecting to meet the one can be a huge JOKE. A joke that can not be funny nor amusing. A joke that simply tells how a fool you can be. A joke wherein you are not even friends in real life. A joke where you only hang one to 10 or AT MOST 15 minutes of conversation. A joke that simply tells how messed up your reality is. The point is, I have been telling myself to be the INDEPENDENT WOMAN. Yes, I like chick flicks, hugots and all those cheesy products of media but I find it disgusting in reality. Most often, people think I am a hopeless romantic but the truth is, finding the one is the least to my priorities though there are times I think of the opportunity costs when one has the one. Oh well. I believe time will come and if not, I get the whole adventure going. See, most people think late twenties or early thirties is the marrying age. For me, absolutely not. It’s too young if you think of all the adventure our country can offer. I think late thirties. Haha. Oh gosh. I am so